A Mothers Anthem

I am the mother of a diabetic child. I don’t know what it’s like to go to sleep at night and know for certain my child will wake up in the morning. I don’t know what it’s like to sleep the whole night through without waking up to do blood tests on my sleeping child. I don’t know what it’s like to prepare a meal without a calculator, measuring cups, and a gram scale. I don’t know ...what it’s like to drop my child off at school and know he will always be in the care of someone who knows how to take care of him. I do know what it’s like to force feed sugar in the middle of the night knowing I am sacrificing my child’s teeth to save his life. I do know what it’s like to draw up insulin at 2 am and pray to God I’m not too sleepy to make a fatal error in judgment, technique or calculation. I do know what it’s like to sit underneath the dining room table holding my sobbing child, explaining to him, “No, we can’t take a break just this one time.”while I inject insulin into his already bruised arm. I do know what it’s like to walk away from the pharmacy counter with an armload of supplies and realize I’ve just gone through another box of 200 syringes. I do know what it’s like to help my child march bravely past the juice and cookies at the school reception that was supposed to be his reward for achieving Student of the Month. I do know what it’s like to look into my child’s eyes and tell him he has an incurable disease and explain to him what that means, And then to be comforted by him when I’m the one who can’t stop sobbing. I do know what it’s like to love and cherish my child every minute of every day, to know that I may someday donate a kidney to him, and that if he were in need of a heart, mine would be out of the question, because it broke a long time ago.I am the mother of a diabetic child. Author: Unknown

Sunday, March 3, 2013

Death of a Pancreas 5.......The end of the first 24 hours with T1D.

March 21st, 2012


I know that my son's father had "lost it" and needed a minute to compose himself. My son is asking where dad went and Marylee explains "dad just needed a minute, he is sad and its okay to be sad and its okay to cry". So a few minutes later, my son's dad returns, sits down and we finish up our 1st of many training sessions and we head out. With our diabetic child in tow, down to the parking lot, dad says his goodbyes for the evening and I load up my son, with his diabetic supplys and we head home as well. What a journey this is going to be as this was all just the 1st 24 hours of diagnosis.....

We get home, I put my son into my bed, turn on the TV for him and I hear those beautful words..."MOM, IM HUNGRY", can I have something to eat? Hungry, my son, he's hungry, for the first time in what seems like forever, he is hungry. I shot of insulin just a hour or 2 before and my son is hungry. Yes, honey, yes of course you can have something to eat. What would you like? Your Dr said to feed you what ever you want and as much as you want, so what will it be? Bacon. Mom, can I have some bacon and an egg?
Yep, bacon and egg it is. So into the kitchen I go and fry up 4 pieces of bacon and 1 egg. Take it to my son and he devours it. Such a beautiful site. Mom, that was the best bacon I have ever had, can I have some more? More? You want more? Of course, you can have more. So into the kitchen I go and I fry up 6 more pieces of bacon and 2 more eggs and take that into my son. I then watch my son eating like he has never ate before. He devours the remaining 6 pieces of bacon and 2 more eggs and is now full and he is already feeling better. 10 pieces of bacon and 3 eggs. Thats the first thing he wanted to eat after being diagnosed with T1D. Watching him eat was the most beautiful thing I had seen. We can do this, we got this. T1D, you have screwed with the wrong mom. You will not win, you will not succeed, you will not control as I will kick your ASS everytime you try to manipulate my son. I have insulin, I have tools, I will win, you will NOT devour my son, you will not destroy my son. I will be there watching, waiting and like a Mamma Bear, i will be there to kick your butt everytime I see your sneaky little ways trying to creep in and take over. I AM HERE TO STAY and I will devour you as I have the INSULIN to gobble you up and make you go away.
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